Mushy Bushy Valentine

For Valentine's Day and for Anne of Spy Girl's I Heart linkup, I would like to tell you a love story. A story about love so strong it couldn't be shaken even by forces that would break many relationships.


This is a story about my wonderful husband Bushy.
 
After I had my two miracles ( the kids we were told we would never have), I seemed to undergo a change. I found myself questioning my sexuality, and subsequently my gender. Over a period of years, and much counselling, I started sorting out a few answers. One of the issues was whether I would stay married. Leaving aside the fact that I had two very young children, I was still in love with Bushy even if my feelings about myself and my attraction had changed. So after much soul searching we decided to stay together and create a new look relationship.
We created new ways to be intimate, and help us feel special.
Of course we haven't ever had a traditional relationship given my Aspergers. So being creative with our intimacy isn't a new thing.

 
One symbol of our love was our wedding rings, which we had designed. But part of my new thinking meant that the style of ring didn't sit well with me, so I stopped wearing it. But I felt naked without it. I wanted another symbol, so bought a new ring in which I felt more comfortable, and asked Bushy to engrave something inside. He kept it a secret.
Imagine my wonder and joy when he gave it to me, and I found he had engraved the word "True".

 
True to myself, and true to each other. Just totally sums up our journey.
So here I offer my tribute to my gentle-man...who still manages to blow me away!


Happy Valentine's Day my love.

 

40 comments:

  1. Oh My. This is the most beautiful story. Thank you so much for sharing! XXXOOO

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  2. That is so worth celebrating! Finding your True Love, staying True to Yourself, and True to Each Other - that's HUGE! Wishing you guys hundreds and thousands, and millions years of happiness together!!!!!!!!!!!! Love xxxx

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  3. What a gift .... sharing your hearts with the world who needs your wonderful example of true love.
    And your trees are superb in every way especially the one decorated with 2 special people!
    Bless you both. D&M xxxxxxxxxx

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  4. It was a little scarey, but i wanted you all to know! xo Jazzy Jack

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  5. Thanks so much for your thrilling wishes. I wish we had millions of years together too! :-D xo Jazzy Jack

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  6. Thanks. I know you know this story so well. But it was special to write it down and share with others. Thanks so much for all your support! Love, Jazzy Jack

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  7. Truly beautiful:-)

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  8. Thanks! It is pretty wonderful now...after all the heartache. xo Jazzy Jack

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  9. beate @ bahnwaerterhaeuschen14 February 2015 at 09:48

    sooo wonderful! you and bushy are such an awesome couple - i can see it even in photos. and what you written in past posts gave me a imagination how gorgeous this love must be. this post of cause proofs it - and moved me to happy tears!
    happy valentines day!!!!!
    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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  10. Love comes and lives in many different flavors and not always traditional for sure. To find someone who will stand by and love us truly unconditionally is a miracle in itself. I remember the first feeling I had when I met my husband for the first time. His sincerity blew me over. Through my health challenges the fact that he has stayed with me through it all and had to compromise in a huge way is the best gift I could ever receive from anyone. A true Valentine!
    Thank you for sharing this. My heart is all warmed up now!

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  11. What a wonderful story!


    bisous
    Suzanne

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  12. Happy tears are always good! Your reply gave me happy tears :-) xo Jazzy Jack

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  13. So happy to warm your heart. Thanks for sharing your story. You have found a true mate. I think we understand love in all its various complicated forms , better as we age. It is a lovely gift aging brings, for sure! xo Jazzy Jack

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  14. Thanks Suzanne! Its certainly a wonderful life as well. I wanted to share to encourage others. You know I don't live a tradional life, no matter how it looks from the outside :-) xo Jazzy Jack

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  15. Hello! I found you through the Beauty In Insanity blog and I must say, I'm very glad I did -- as someone who only discovered their Asexuality a year ago, the amount of thankfulness I have for my open-minded husband is unbelievable. I love this post! <3

    love,
    a

    www.missdecaf.blogspot.com

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  16. Thank you for sharing with us this wonderful story of true love. How great it is to have a person in one's life who completely understands you and accepts you the way you are.

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  17. When shit hits the fan, this is when you know your guy is THE guy. Everyone can be happy and content with their loved ones when everything is going well, but when you have issues to deal with, crap to endure this is when it becomes clear if this person is your person. I am so happy your Bushy is your person, because I love Bushy, he seems like such a bad ass to be around, not to mention his beard is 10/10! :D I wish you all the happiness in the world!

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  18. Hello a!
    Lovely to have you stop by. I'm so pleased you did. Our husbands are the best! I'm surprised at the many hours of counselling I paid for that encouraged me to leave my marriage. It was hard to resist in a way, but I'm so totally glad I stayed. Yes, I think Bushy has a rough time of it, and wish otherwise for him but he has chosen to stay, just as I have. So I need to respect that, and believe he loves me :-)
    See you around! xo Jazzy Jack

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  19. So totally true Olga! I really don't know if I knew what I was doing when I chose him. But I looked at how he treated his mother and his pets, and that seems to have held true! Wise advice for anyone choosing a mate :-D xo Jazzy Jack

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  20. Thankyou so much my friend!
    Yes, he is definitely bad ass, and he was thrilled with your assessment of his beard. He's had it all the time I've known him, but worries people will think he's trying to copy the young hipsters!xo Jazzy Jack

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  21. lovely to read your touching story!, I'm not a romantic, but this is my kind of true love story!
    besos & amor

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  22. I was also touched by your story! And you both look sooo together in the photo! A true love story.

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  23. Yes, real long lasting love doesn't really have much to do with the fairytale happy endings. And yet, when you struggle through, it kind of feels like that anyway! I also loved your interview on Natalia's blog. I can see your lovely outfits now with new appreciation :-) xo JJ

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  24. Yes, we were on a date doing a selfie with the camera balanced precariously on a table!
    Fun to remember. Our love is a beautiful masterpiece that we have worked hard to forge. I'm so grateful I stuck around! xo JJ

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  25. Thank you much for sharing this story. I was moved. True love, wow, it's a magic thing. Enduring respect and love between people, the kind that rides the bad times, it's a precious thing. Your ring is beautiful and the inscription makes it glow. I love the kissing trees, entangled.

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  26. Aren't they amazing? Bushy found them in one of his forests.
    "True love" makes me think of the Princess Bride, one of our absolute favourite movies. We watch it on our anniversary! So many cool lines.
    Thanks for your comment. I was afraid I was oversharing, but I did want you all to know about our and others relationships that deal with this. xo Jazzy Jack

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  27. Your love story is beautiful, I think love is it's own unique experience, when we love, we love. I can't explain it as eloquently as I'd like! You and Bushy are a beautiful couple, you can see the love and affection you have for each other. x x x

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  28. Looks to me like you're both keepers! Wonderful story ... and I'm glad to see someone else whose wedding rings change as they grow as their relationship evolves! Dan has just put up with all my stuff for over two decades, and I'm grateful for his love and loyalty. True, indeed. Bushy knows how to charm, doesn't he! What a pretty pair you've become!

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  29. Thanks so much! It's true, love is beyond definition. Hope your love is home soon! xo JJ

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  30. Yes! You are the only other person I've met who has changed their wedding rings.
    You're not so bad on the old charm yourself :-)
    A pretty pair eh? I'll have to tell Bushy. xo JJ

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  31. What a lovely story and that picture of the two of you confirms the love you have for each other. xxx

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  32. I know, and it's my life! How lucky am I. Mind you, your life would make a great story as well. Great to see you back, and I'm so pleased you had such a lovely break as usual. Still, you are such a positive person, I imagine you would make the best of anything. You and Jon look like a great couple too...working together so well. xo Jazzy Jack

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  33. What a beautiful story, JJ. You have a wonderful man and how amazing it must feel to be that well loved. Beautiful photo of the two of you! xoxoxo

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  34. Mine changed too. Though the story is not very romantic and the fact that I designed it myself and my husband didn't participate at all was probably some nice foreshadowing. LOL Your story is much more romantic than mine.

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  35. Thanks Shawna! I was hoping people weren't thinking I was anti-divorce. Just not right for us. I am so blessed. Although we've been through our sorrows. xo Jazzy Jack

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  36. I'm sorry to hear your story. I don't want to come off as more romantic than thou! xo Jazzy Jack

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  37. Does it sound odd to say I am not sad that my marriage turned sour and I ended up divorced? Perhaps I am not sorry because I realised eventually that my husband was not going to change so I would much rather be divorced than still in that situation. I am happy now. It was not all bad in the past, but I m better now and I have no regrets about anything. xo

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If a topic has special significance for you, or touches you in some way, I'd love to hear your story! I will return the favour and we will gently touch hands across the miles...or kilometres :-)